(NASB) James 4:1 “WHAT IS the source of quarrels and conflicts among you?  Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members?”

  In a family, spouses are at odds with each other, parents and children at war with each other.  Arguments, quarrels, bullying, abuse come from ‘within you’.  What starts out as a thought then escalates to bitterness, anger, defensive positions and a demand to have one’s own way.

(NASB) James 4:2 “You lust and do not have; so you commit murder.  You are envious and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel.  You do not have because you do not ask.
3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures.”

  For a child of God (that follower of Christ who is obedient to God’s word) it is Christ Jesus Who sits on the throne of power in them, not self. 
  Self, that old nature with which all are born wants control…at any cost or price.

  The solution to this all too human dilemma:
(NASB) James 4:7-8 “Submit therefore to God.  Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
8 Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.  Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”

  The solution?  (NASB) James 4:10 “Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.”

  You have options…to quarrel, argue and fight or to submit to God and ask His directions for that difficult relationship.
  The break-down in society begins with not having a relationship with the personal, Living God.  Then it moves to the break-down of the family unit.
  Let God’s Sovereignty begin with you…submit to His love, mercy, grace, forgiveness and know Jesus Christ as your King, your Savior is the first step.